The Universe Hugged Me Tonight...

I tried doing dishes, but there is too much to say. Sorry Lucas. I am feeling envy for all writers who have ever successfully written about New York, for as I am about to dive into this beautiful beast of a task, I am overwhelmed with words and phrases swirling in my mind, images sketched on the chalkboard just behind my forehead blazing bright like a slideshow on cocaine. I will try to spill this ecstasy that is in my mind body and soul, a gift from this whirlwind city, as best as i can...

I feel I must start backwards, as the events that just transpired are most fresh, though climactically speaking it may not be the best choice... (climactically means referring to a climax, yes i made it up)

walking home at midnight from one williamsburg apartment to another, a brisk pace due to a combination of the urge to relieve myself, in the urinary sense, and also because I had just been given a gift from the Gods...love poured out on the streets of New York tonight, and seemed to follow me all evening, building to an orgasm of types on the L train heading in from 6th avenue...It began even before that, as LJB and I transferred from the F and waited for the L train and we spotted her...the dancing queen in all her glory: fingertip-clipped gloves, simple khakis worn with wear, a practical jacket for the chill, normal dirty blonde hair, an un-made-up face, average height, average frame, and armed with her modern boombox, that indeed was changing the world...

From just beyond the I-beam, about 10 yards away she moved like a goddess, free. Not too showy, but enough movement to attract herself a mighty load of attention at this hour of night in the subways...who was this angel, dancing on the edge of the track, the edge of life? everyone watched smiling, some uncomfortable, some curious, and most all of us jealous. How could she be so free? Didn't she know that someone would be laughing at her? LJB and I watched, smiled. Laughed. We wondered whether it was choreographed, it was like she was marking a dance she had learned many moons ago...her eyes closed, living in her own reality...a beautiful brother walked up to her and stuck his hand out, bobbing it to the beat she was pumping into all of our hearts...she smiled, but did not act as we all thought she might, (surprised that anyone was watching)...she just kept on dancing...we all boarded the train and LJB and I ended up sitting next to her...I wanted to find out what she was listening to...but mostly I just wanted the chance to connect with her, with God...She was half with us and half in the heavens, her soul infused with a beat that her body could never let go of...the brother sat on her other side and she shared her left earbud...LJB shared yet more music with us, but I was fixed on these two beautiful strangers...after both nodding their heads to the beat, eventually they just were resting them on each other, like two lovers who had lived a lifetime together...every once and a while she would sing a lyric and then back to the sweet smile...I tried to take a picture, but my camera was dead...an omen perhaps... i see now that a moment that beautiful could never be captured on film...I told LJB what I was feeling, "I am so in love with them right now. So beautiful."

I just stared as if I was gazing into the pupils of God...their love quenching my soul's thirst for IT...the train stopped and i saw that this moment was about to speed by faster than the train would leave and the angel leaned into the brother gave him a couple of generous kisses on the cheek...glowing, she skipped off the train like a fairy, only once pausing on the stairs to take one last look at her love, blowing him a kiss and a small one to me, she danced up the stairs...I sung her praises to my singing friend, LJB...I had to say something...I ran after her, just barely catching her before she glided through the turnstile...

"You are beautiful. Thank you, thank you so much. You're amazing, so free, what a gift..." I gushed...she smiled and turned into me...we hugged like two souls melting together, and she kissed my neck and as she turned to whisk herself through the turnstile, to vanish up the stairs and into the night, she laughed and said, "You're amazing!" Aha! She had one last gift for me after all...an affirmation of all that I know and believe, but yet sometimes gets clouded in fear...she reminded me that LOVE is absolutely all there is...

I was now glowing, and how could you not after hugging God...LJB and I laughed and announced our gratitude for the night...we seemed to be following her for a bit, then she turned left and whoosh... she skipped out of sight...even now I wonder if she was some kind of angel...

And now I sit here in my apartment thanking God I am here...and as I told LJB on the walk home..."A night like this, and I have no more financial worries...this is it...Love is enough, the rest will work itself out..."

I am going to try to remember that...

There is more to say about this night including running into Max Haymer, the number one jazz pianist in the world, and a college buddy on the subway going to our first show, another stunning moment of excitement in the subway, and he told us about his show at 9:45...we went first to see Jeff something at Rockwood music on "the lower east side" a simple man with brilliant lyrics and melodies that set feet tapping and hips swaying...

An aussie woman who was traveling opened me with a line, "How you going?" which confused me...and then I was thankful that she was courageous enough to talk to me, as we both sat silently, awkwardly, next to each other waiting for the next act...she had been traveling for 2 months, including two weeks in the city before heading back home next week...she said new york was not as glamorous as she thought it would be and made her appreciate her home more, that she realized Melbourne is actually a pretty cool place...she had been traveling with her boyfriend, a lighter for a successful Aussie Circus company until they broke up a week ago...she advised me that traveling with a girlfriend would be difficult, and I assured her that would not be the case for me, instead I was traveling with two of the biggest pain in the ass friends I'd ever met...(that's a joke)

I gazed to the window during the second set and noticed a man I recognized. An older dude, but someone you could never forget, balding short curly hair, bleached blonde and dressed like a rockstar...then he came inside, he came up to where LJB and I were sitting and LJB told him she recognized him, and he said the same, then I said the same and he said the same...that means that we all recognized each other...I couldn't remember where, and then I saw his necklace: a Buddha in a silver frame with glass over it...I was ecstatic, I had met him the night I left NY, December 16, 2008...he was at The Living Room when LJB and I went there to see another of her friends play...that night we had somehow gotten into a conversation and bizarrely enough joked about being in a relationship, doing the complaining that happens over a long stretch of time with a lover and ends in the demise of the thing, and then we said we had hoped we could still be friends...a bizarre joke that had us laughing hysterically...and here he was tonight....he didn't quite remember that night, which was fine because I did...I took it as an Omen that I was exactly where I was supposed to be...I watched him interacting with his beautiful lady friend...they were both older, but clearly attractive, and, when in their younger years, were the hottest thing on the block...as we decided to leave to make it to Max's...I couldn't leave without giving him something, but all that I felt was meaningful enough was my gratitude rock...even now I long for it a bit, but I needed him to know how grateful I was to see him...he thanked me and gave me a business card of types...wow...amazing to see him, and more so to remember him, a man I had only known for five minutes...

oh yeah...this means i'm back in new york...

lots and lots and lots...
good night.
-mitch

Part One of a Two Part Series Entitled: Storming the Gates of Rich Orange County With One of My Soul Brothers, Nik Kazoura

An early start was out of the question. God knows what we were doing, but I can guess there was ample dicking around, the eating of a Popsicle, one solved Rubik's Cube, and a healthy dose of the British sketch comedy show: Man Stroke Woman. And cut.

The beautiful day snuck in the back door of Bluefish Lane, through Margo's mini-potted-forest on the back porch and eventually made its way over to Nik and I. We were seated in our underwear at the computer when it slapped us both in the face and said, "Get your asses out here. Do NOT waste me." We followed the instinct to soak up some California sun, and I took it in with a little greater appreciation, knowing that for the first time in five years I would not be enjoying a Southern California Spring or Summer. (which are not all that much different from a Southern California Fall or Winter)

Unsure of exactly where to go or what to do, we just hopped in the xB and started driving down PCH...I've driven this stretch a million times before, but on this drive I realized how quintessentially California it is. If one travels to California, they ought to spend an entire afternoon just driving through the beach cities. I told Nik about Esau, the saxophonist I had met on the subway in New York who told me he had never been to California, but that he hoped to be able to take his two daughters to Disneyland someday. I hoped instead he would just be able to make this drive some day. I cannot imagine not knowing what a California sunset feels like...I wish everyone in New York could experience just one, as I am sure it would help them embrace the idea of stopping to take a breath and just enjoy the moment as-is...Perhaps they would also come to understand the music of Jack Johnson, and Jimmy Buffet's hit tune, "Margaritaville."

We drove in and out of cities we had explored before, and I began to get anxious to find a new spot to start playing with Nik's camera during "magic hour." Dana Point presented itself nicely...Our walk started on a cliff overlooking the bay of ridiculous yachts. Orange County continues to blow my mind as one of the most outward displays of wealth I have encountered. What makes it so mind-boggling is that luxury is common: the sight of Porches, Lamborghinis, and Rolls Royces no longer receives a second glance. This is the area that causes America its confusion about wealth. We see "average Americans" with these luxurious toys, the newest technology, going shopping midday during the work week, and we think that only if we have the lifestyle they have, are we wealthy. What we forget is that they are among the top two percent wealthiest in the world, our context is totally skewed...

I see how easy it is to get going on a tangent in this blogging activity...yikes...

Along our walk we encountered another cultural gem. About twenty-five Orange County Parents gathered to take pictures of their precious fifteen and sixteen-year-olds going to what may have been their first winter formal. These kids were dressed to the nines, and have been groomed to be our nation's next wealthy upper-class, for they know no other way. As my mind wandered to thoughts of high school dances, and beautiful girls whom I had no idea how to act around, I remembered what it was like to be at the very beginning of this figurative dance between the sexes. Having absolutely no clue, and no experience, but acting as though it was the opposite...And as I look at myself now, not all that much has changed. I'm disappointed to say I haven't made all that much progress as far as my understanding of the dance goes. I've racked up a fairly wide range of experiences, but the female species continues to be one of the biggest question marks in my brain. As I told a dear friend once, "There is nothing on this planet that has such a polarizing affect on me as women." I like to believe that upon death this will be one of the first revelations, because as it stands now, I often tell God, "There has got to be an easier way."

Weaving our way downward toward sea-level, the sun neared its ritual setting...laughing at dogs and continuing to battle urges to punt the little ones, I articulated (one of my favorite words) my desire not to fall into the trap of society: buying a dog with your lover. Everywhere we looked there were couples walking quietly, often looking distracted or disengaged, led by a dog on a leash. At this point in my life it just looks like another beautiful distraction, and quite the money pit (this past summer my parents spent $1500 on dog surgery to retrieve five rocks and two Scrabble pieces from little Zoe's tummy).

Past pirate ships and private docks we came to the breakwater edge where Nik attempted a super-slow shutter speed picture of the water. Better luck next time. Gazing out at the Pacific Ocean I wondered about my plans to be on the other side of this little pond next summer in Thailand. I also remember thinking "this would be a great place to bring a girl."

Fulfilled. Exactly. IT. I experienced the joy of feeling alive, full of love, and accomplishment. I was glad the sun had coaxed us out of the comforts of home, and resisted the urge to kick myself for not enjoying sunsets more often...Let Go.

Practice Blog

Inspired both by three dear friends who keep what i consider to be the top three blogs of all time, and by the constant suggestion of people to "blog" my adventures this year, I am attempting to make this a habit...I have been hesitant to do so because I worry that I will share my best stories on this site. Then when I get back from my travels, I will see people, begin to tell them a story or joke and they will interrupt me with the punchline, having already read it on this site. I also have a small, fear that when the Y2K bug finally kicks in, all of my precious writing will be lost forever...yes, i know i can back it all up on an external hard drive, but call me old-fashioned, I just prefer writing in my journal...As I have started writing quite a bit in the past months I will use this as my tool to document events and keep track of my day-to-day life on the road. The journal will be used primarily for reflections, stream-of-consciousness thinking on paper, and experimental type stuff, (some people call this type of writing 'poetry')...it feels kinda silly to even be saying this on a public journal...as i reread it, i am already thinking, "who gives a shit?...this is the most boring blog ever-written." off to a good start...

also, be prepared for an abundance of ellipses...